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Election 2008: Prediction Porn
Now that I have your attention, it's time for some last-minute predictions about a few elections happening around these parts. Maybe you'll be amazed. Maybe you won't. But enjoy them either way. I voted early this election, and if you didn't then get your bum to a voting booth on November 4th.
For Indiana Governor:
I voted: The Libertarian guy (Andy Horning)
I predict: Gov. Mitch Daniels (55-40-5%)
Reason: On one hand, I'm not exactly cool with Mitch Daniels whole privatization agenda or the new Voter ID laws his secretary of state is supporting. On the other hand, Jill Long Thompson, the Democratic challenger, hasn't run a good campaign. She hasn't really put her name out there, and I didn't hear much about her plans for the state outside of the college democrats. Daniels is a nice guy, and his staff did give me a few free burgers whenever RV One stopped by campus. Even a few of my Obama-voting friends said they were probably going to vote Daniels. I decided to toss my vote away on this one, but Daniels is going to win, and life will go on.
Wildcard moment: Governor Daniels "RV One" accidentally explodes in a fiery blaze while in the parking lot. Daniels acts like he planned it all along, and a barbeque breaks out. Burgers and hot dogs for all!
For Indiana's 9th District:
I voted: Baron Hill
I predict: Baron Hill (49-46-4%)
Reason: It's difficult to pick in this one. Baron Hill is a conservative-leaning Democrat with the "Blue Dog" coalition that preaches fiscal responsibility, yet has no qualms shoveling billions of taxpayer dollars into Iraq where it mysteriously disappears. On the other hand, he did vote against the Billionaire Bailout package. The Republican, Mike Sodrel is a conservative tool who has tried to gut environmental regulations and the estate tax (because those rich people are oh, so oppressed) during his one term in the House. Eric Schansberg (the Libertarian) is a smart guy, and he's honest about his positions, but it's his positions that I disagree with. I voted for Hill in the end, and I think he'll win another two years from us, but I just wish there were more choices.
Wildcard moment: Mike Sodrel's mustache comes to life and tries to latch onto the face of a more promising Republican politician for sustenance.
For President of the USA
I voted: If you can't guess by now, read my previous columns.
I predict: Barack Obama (338-200 Electoral Votes)
Reason: The winds of Hope and Change are at the Messiah's back!
Seriously though, there may have been some poll tightening, but it's only been narrowing about 1-2% on average. Obama's managed to spark excitement among the base, while John McCain has reluctant followers at his side. Four years ago, the positions were reversed with Bush and Kerry and the polls were much closer than they are now. Obama's ground game is going to win it for him, and win it big. McCain's only hope is a last stand in Pennsylvania and hoping that enough old people in Florida will get confused and then eight years down the road we can have a sequel to the HBO special Recount. However, I don't see it happening this time.
Wildcard moment: A horrible glitch in Indiana's electronic voting machines ends up awarding all of our state's electoral votes to the Ralph Nader/Cardozo the Parrot ticket. Also, Sarah Palin and Joe the Plumber will linger around as punchlines for a few weeks and then appear on some new FOX reality show.
Feel free to post your own predictions and wildcard moments below. Also, don't forget that Luke Russert will be showing up at the Indiana Memorial Union on election night, so if you want the chance to be on a cable news channel, come to the Union and hope he thrusts a microphone in your face.
__________________
"America... just a nation of two hundred million used car salesmen with all the money we need to buy guns and no qualms about killing anybody else in the world who tries to make us uncomfortable."
--Hunter S. Thompson
Last edited by Adam Mendelevitz; 11-03-2008 at 05:39 PM.
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